Blondes. Can’t live with ’em… can’t live without ’em.

4 Nov

We’ve spent the last several days trying as hard as we can to make a dent in the hardships felt by families on the East Coast, the victims of Superstorm Sandy’s wrath.

I have to tell you, it’s not all “happiness and handsprings” around here. Most of us are working from the road, as we try to carry on caseloads as well as arrange for cases of goods to be collected for distribution to families in harm’s way.

While we’re doing this, a few of our pals are checking in, just to make sure we’re “okay”.

We’re sleep deprived and pulling our hair out (those of us that still have hair)… but we’re okay.

Anyone who knows me knows that I have an affinity for those of the “blonde” persuasion. If you wander through my torrid past, you’ll find a bunch of them.

Let’s face it, growing up on the beaches of Southern Cali kinda made liking blondes mandatory. Have you ever walked the boardwalk at Huntington Beach or Newport? Man…

(I know, I’m a pig. Most men are. Deal with it. But in my defense, I’m a SMART pig.) ๐Ÿ™‚

I have a friend named Daria who is about as blonde as you can possibly get without chemicals. Love her to death, but she’s probably the well-spring for blonde jokes everywhere.

One look at her and you almost involuntarily roll your eyes…

I mean, I asked her to wash the vegetables for a salad once and she used Dawn Dishsoap. I’m not kidding.

Another time, she brought some prepared meat to a “dinner buffet” soirre I threw at my house. We set out her platter with the rest of the stuff, but it didn’t get consumed. When she pulled me aside to voice her dismay, I explained to her that while we were grateful she brought something for the meal, it was pork and we couldn’t eat it because we’re Jewish.

She spent the next five minutes trying to explain to us that it was okay, because it wasn’t pork, it was HAM… ๐Ÿ˜‰

When she found out that we were teaching people to build homes using containers, she suggested that we stop whining about shipping costs and just send the ISBUs to families by UPS. After all, they were just big boxes.

“What’s the big deal? I see big UPS semi’s towing big boxes all the time. If other people are doing it… why can’t you?” ๐Ÿ˜‰

Daria’s the sweetest girl on the planet but she’s a never ending source of laughter as she’s compiled a compendium of blonde jokes that keep us in stitches when we need it most.

After calling in today to “see how we were hangin”… she just sent me this one and I thought I’d share it with you. After a week spent coping with Superstorm Sandy and it’s aftermath, she thought that we could use the laugh. Hope that you can, too…

This blonde says:

“Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive, double-pane, energy-efficient kind.

Today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He complained that the work had been completed a year ago and I still hadn’t paid for them.

Hey! Just because I’m blonde and big-boobed doesn’t mean that I am automatically stupid!

So, I repeated to him EXACTLY what his fast-talking sales guy told me last year- that these windows would pay for themselves in a year. In fact, the guy put it in writing!

‘Hello? Check your calendar! It’s been a year… so they’re paid for!’ I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally hung up. The contractor never called back.

I bet it’s because he felt like an idiot…”

Oh, stop groaning. What do you expect from us? We’re TIRED. ๐Ÿ˜‰