Happy, Happy… 2010! Now shut up, and pass the Plasma Cutter!

Greetings, Corten Campers!

Happy Freakin’ New Year!

Hey, at the very least, I can say that it’s been pretty exciting here at Renaissance Ronin over the last year!  In looking back at the blog post statistics, I have to tell you that I was surprised at the posts that actually made it into the Top Ten.

As we move into 2010, I can’t wait to see what is yet to come! Corten Container Homes are springing up across the land! I can almost hear it now;

ISBU Homes in Indianapolis!

Metal Mansions in Madison!

Corten Communities clustering in Columbus!

Shipping Container Suburbia’s in Shreveport!

Okay, so I wasn’t completely shocked at the posts on the top of the pile, because the truth is that some of those posts represent what I think was my best work! (I know, I know… I have really low standards!  Man, you guys are tough!) 

And in 2010, the best is yet to come! I have some tricks up my sleeve…

Muwahahahah!

To recap 2009, here’s a look at what happened here;

In 2009 RenaissanceRonin (thru the WordPress servers alone) had visitors from 197 countries, over 61,000 New Visitors in America alone (acquired by recording “unique” IP addresses) and 135,628 Pageviews as I type this.

Currently, Renaissance Ronin has over 20,000 RSS Feed subscribers.

Renaissance Ronin is “syndicated” (meaning that other people run my blog posts on their sites as well), and my posts appear on many other blogs and websites as well. Those view numbers ran conservatively over 400,000 pageviews.

That means that over a half million times, I made people reach for the Tylenol Extra Strength! Man, Mom would be so proud!

I want to wish each and every one of you a Happy New Year, one filled with prosperity, and love, and joy! Thank you again for all your support and it’s my hope that you will continue to read Renaissance Ronin!!

Happy New Year!!!!

Here, in a nutshell, are the top 10 posts of 2009:

10. I ain’t the Energizer Bunny…

“As we build our new “Shipping Container Casa” we’re taking a hard look at ways to cut our power consumption.

You see, we’re planning on using photovoltaic systems to make power the house will run on. And since  we’re gonna be responsible for that power, we need to start looking at ways to manage it.

This is NOT our house, but it’s a nice one, huh?

Now, a while back, I wrote a post about ways you can actually save energy. But, now that we’re starting to get serious about this house, it’s time to get serious about our power consumption. And we’re not the only ones, I’m sure. With heating and electricity costs soaring, and the economy teetering on the edge of disaster, it makes sense to muster a few troops, and start looking at ways to make energy-saving efforts around the house.”…

Container House - Main Floor

9. Look! It’s a “recycled house,” Martha! I think they used GARBAGE!

“Welcome to ALTERNATIVE HOUSING 101.6 and a half…:

Okay, I think I have it all figured out. (Kings “X”!)

The goal is to build housing, El Rapido!

And, it has to be “semi-conventional,” and provide all the usual amenities.

Now, I’ll warn you in advance that this is going to be a long “post,” because I’m going to discuss the house I‘m building out of “aircraft hangar parts, and shipping containers,” specifically.

It’s my hope that by the end of this post, you’ll start to be able to picture exactly what we’re about to do.

Now obviously, you’re going to have to use your “mind’s eye,” so use your “nice” crayons, okay? We have enough obstacles as it is! LOL!”…

8. The Many Faces of a Shipping Container – “Recording Studio in a Box”

“When last we met, I told you all about “living in a box, underground.”

This time, I’m gonna tell you the story of a life “recording underground” (well, nearly… It IS Australia, after all… It’s “under ground…” from here!), in a box we call an ISBU, to MAKE a living!!

(I know, I know… stop groaning!)

As my family slowly builds our new home out of Shipping Containers and other recycled materials, some guys are making a living, by turning the same boxes into businesses.

Pay attention folks! Thanks to the President, there’s about eleventy-gazillion dollars in Stimulus money out there floating around waiting for people to grab it.  And, this falls into about three categories I can think of off the top of my head; New (small) business, “Green” application, recycling materials… and I bet there’s more!  I wanna be one of those guys!

“Ronin like money. Money goooood!”

You should wanna be one of those guys, too!”…

7. “Mi Casa Es Su Container!!!” It is too! Honest!

I get all kinds of email. Some of it is interesting, some of it is inflammatory, and some of it is downright entertaining…

“People get really emotional when you start talking about houses. They start to draw mental pictures, and depending on their “special talents,” some of those pictures can start really interesting dialogs.

As I read my email each day, I get to reflect on those images. Hey, some are really nice, “Mental Monets,” that sooth my soul. But some of them are “Industrial nightmares, right out of Freddy Kruger movies…” Brrrr!…

6. Drumroll please! Welcome the $8,000 Shipping Container Home!!!

While out scouring the web for porn… um… er… news, I came across this little gem…

“It seems that the idea of using Shipping Containers as housing is picking up steam!

Rather than recap an already good journalistic piece, I’ll just butt in from time to time, okay? Hot off the AP Wire:

CORRALES, New Mexico (AP) – It was a side trip through a destitute, ramshackle neighborhood in Ciudad Juarez, Mexico, that detoured Brian McCarthy from building houses in Albuquerque to an idea to offer the very poor a chance to own a home.

His answer lies in a humble steel shipping container 40 feet long, 8 feet wide and 8½ feet tall.

See, it ain’t just moi!”…

5. Doctor, Doctor! All this “Wind Power” is making me sick!

“Those of you that have been faithfully following along (and shame on you if you haven’t!) know that my family is building a home in Southern Mississippi, out of junk, rubbish, flotsam, jetsam, and even some old garbage. Yes, we are!

At least, that’s what the neighbors are saying…

The reality is that my family is one of those that got caught between the “fine lines of insurance litigation,” and we have to find our own way through the “we don’t have a house anymore” maze, seemingly without any real assistance, after Hurricane Katrina ate our old house!

So, we’re building an “alternative” home. Now, that doesn’t mean it’s an “extra” one, or that there will be punk rock music screaming out of it at all hours while Ronin and scantily clad girls gyrate on the front lawn”…

4. While my IQ gently creeps…

“And now, for something completely different;

While we struggle and toil, down that garbage strewn path that will lead us to “Container Home Ownership,” my brain is starting to hurt!

Now, according to my wife, that’s not surprising, since I’m operating at a “diminished capacity” anyway.

Well, I suppose that’s true, I have lost a few IQ points, since I got married… In fact, it may have happened while we were dating… Hmmmm…

As this goes to post, I’m writing  “An Idiot’s guide to Geothermal Activity.’” It’s heady stuff, and I’m operating at a deficit, so you’re gonna get what you get, huh?  As I struggle through a “Do It Yourself” Geothermal Heating and Cooling series, try this one on”…

3. “The Stimulus” has stimulated my brain…

You know… it’s funny…

“All things really do come back around!

When I was a kid, my parents (“Gawd fearin’, man-killin’, shoot–em-up and eat the entrails”)  US Marines, had us convinced that the world was going to come to an end in our lifetimes.

So, while most kids grew up on Bambi movies and trips to the Ice Cream Shop (does anybody remember “Foster’s Freeze?”) we grew up on “Bambi Burgers” and instead of settling down in front of the TV every Sunday night to watch Walt Disney”…

2. Like it or not – Shipping Container Homes are coming to a lot near you!

“My family is building a home using shipping containers as structure. When I started this project, I thought I’d just throw up a picture from time to time, interspersed with whatever rant I was currently on, to demonstrate “what a nut-case that idiot “Ronin” is.” But”…

And the number one post for 2009 was (fanfare please!);

1. I’d like a Number 3, extras Won-Tons and hold the sulphur!

“Where we live, here in Mississippi, it seems that as the heat of summer comes on, the reports of odors, respiratory complaints and corrosion are surfacing.  Now you’d think that was normal, because this part of the woods is filled with crusty, cantankerous old b@st@rds that have been alive since the Civil War. Just ask ‘em… boy, will you get an earful!

But, it’s not the “cranks” this time. It’s Ma and Pa Normal (okay… okay… “nearly-normal”), in their newly rebuilt Bayou Bunkers!…”

Well, there you have it, Boys and Girls!

An entire year of psychosis, neurosis, and even nostalgia… wrapped up in one page.  Hundreds of posts, scores of rants, and even a pretty picture or two! 

And there’s more to come! You see, I got this”Crazy Med’s”  medication refill, that guarantees…. we.ll… um… never mind!

I look forward to meeting you here (man, some of you should at least dress up a little bit  before you park yourself in front of that computer! Brrrrrr!) as we share good times, hard times, and CONTAINER HOME BUILDING!

HAVE A GREAT NEW YEAR!

Stay tuned!

As my family recycles, reclaims, and even BEGS for building materials (sometimes “on my knees”) I write this blog, because like many other families in America and beyond right now…  my family’s SURVIVAL is at stake.

I’m asking you to get involved.

If I’ve helped you, informed you, educated you, or just entertained you with the hundreds of posts we written… please consider donating a few bucks to the blog, to help us survive and rebuild OUR home. Every dollar counts, and  every penny gets carefully spent. There’s a Paypal button right up there at the top of the page. It’s easy, it’s SAFE, and it’s SECURE. Every family deserves a home, and ours is no different. Our family needs a home. Our situation is dire. I’m not going to waste bandwidth plastering pictures up of my wife in her sickbed… or my 2 year old little boy who orbits it. I’ve written about the circumstances here, already. If you can spare “a donation to the cause”, we’d appreciate it.

Okay, ONE picture… Santa came!

We want THIS YEAR to be the year that we heal, and become a family again, living safely, warmly, and productively.

We want that for each and every one of your families, too!  And working together, I know that we can accomplish that. Thanks!

“New Years Lies” and other stuff…

It’s that time of year again.

While I sit here writing a three part series about building and living in Container Homes that I’ve begun to refer to as;

“I wanna live anywhere BUT here!!”

and as I quietly watch the rain hammer us into something that resembles a muddy bog, I’m reminded that in the end (each and a every one of us) are all we have.

As my 2 year old son Joshua lies sleeping on the couch (thank the Gawds! He’s been a little terrorist all day!)    I’m reminded that…

Each of us has a relationship with someone else, something else, somewhere else… and we are defined by those relationships.

Believe me, just ask my Mother-In-Law…” Oy.

As “the Holidays” roll to a close, I’m remembered that it’s almost time for “tradition” to bite us on the butt again as we “gather” in those relationships…

You know, that time when (filled glass in hand) we all look right into each others eyes and then tell whoppers about how we’re gonna do things differently, starting “tomorrow.”

It’s called; “New Years Resolutions.”

I’m a big fan of guys like Physicist Amory Lovins of The Rocky Mountain Institute, who preaches the practice of using resources wisely.

I suppose that I’m like this for many reasons.

1. I’m poor. Truly. Between hurricanes and a horrendous disease (cancer), my family is carrying a  heavy burden.
2. I’ve traveled the world, and seen people living at levels most of us couldn’t survive, and they considered themselves lucky”, even “wealthy”.
3. Resources are “limited” by nature.
4. I’m smart enough to know that “those in charge – aren’t.”

Like the soap-box rantings of most competent cult leaders (which I’ve lately been accused of being, again…) Amory preaches the “four part platform”.

Here’s his:

(And pay attention, because there may be a test at the end, huh?)

The Four Principles of Natural Capitalism

Radical resource productivity:

Using natural resources far more efficiently is both profitable and better for the environment.

Biomimicry:

Using nature as mentor, model, and measure yields superior design solutions that profitably eliminate waste, loss, and harm. Nature offers extraordinary design solutions honed by 3.8 billion years of rigorous testing; whatever didn’t work was recalled by the Manufacturer.

Service and flow economy:

Providing appropriate services in place of direct product consumption—decreasing costs, hassles, and material waste. The concept entails a new perception of value, a shift from the acquisition of goods as a measure of affluence to an economy where the continuous receipt of quality, utility, and performance promotes well-being.

Reinvestment in natural capital:

Sustaining, restoring, and expanding stocks of natural capital will help reverse world-wide planetary destruction, so that the biosphere can produce more abundant ecosystem services and natural resources.

But, Ronin? What the hell does this have to do with “New Years Resolutions?”

If we could all just resolve to try and use these simple rules to guide the direction of our footsteps, we could really CHANGE the world.

You don’t have to be rich. You don’t have to be smart. You don’t even have to be an adult!

(According to my Mother-In-Law, I ain’t even ANY of those three…)

Here’s just a couple of ideas of things that you CAN do;

Pay attention to our personal use of resources.

“Close that door! Were you born in a barn?” 

.

Work with the Earth, instead of against it.

“Um… Photovoltaic Panels point South, right?”

.

Use only what you actually need and get it from a point close by.

“Geez, Walmart has EVERYTHING!” 

.

Think about what you’re putting in the air.

“Ronin! Shut UP! All that Hot Air is contributing to Climate Change!”

.

Time for the test:

We all make an impact on the planet.

Like my good friend Peat Bakke at Peat.Org asks;

What are YOU doing to change the World?

Start tomorrow. Make it your New Years Resolution, hmmm?

Stay tuned.

Just drop that Shipping Container anywhere!

Greetings, Campers!

Evidently, Santa was good enough to some of you, that you still have some small change jingling around in your pockets, and you want to buy a shipping container or six.

Lately, I’m getting barraged with questions about actually buying containers.

Well, this IS a container home blog, after all.

So, in the next few days (after I finish this series I’m working on about finding the place to PUT those containers) I’ll write a post about how to find the boxes, and what you’ll encounter when you do it.

But, to address the most recent “question barrage”, I offer you this;

*************

Dear Ronin,

I want to buy shipping containers. I want to build a home out of them.  But I’m concerned, because the guy I’m buying them from keeps trying to tack on an additional fee, to deliver them to my property.

This doesn’t seem fair. If I buy a car, they don’t charge me a fee to put it in my driveway, In fact, in this economy, they’re happy to do it!

What gives?

Signed,

A skeptical shopper…

*************

Dear “Skeptical”,

Are you NUTS?

Beyond the cost of that box, there’s ALWAYS the “delivery charge.”

When you buy your groceries at Wal-Mart, do they deliver them to your house for free?

NO.

When you buy furniture, do they offer to tote it to your house, for nothing?

NO.

Shipping containers weigh 8,000 pounds. They won’t fit in your mini-van, and they don’t have wheels on them so that they can be towed behind your SUV back to your neighborhood.

Have I ever said ONE TIME in this blog that when you buy a container, the delivery is included? Huh? Well?

Not just NO, but HELL NO!

That guy selling you the container is only making money off the box sitting in his storage yard. Sure, the prices are going up (almost daily, it seems) but for the most part, a decent container can still be had for under $2,000.00.

But getting it home, so you can attack it with plasma cutters and grinders is another story entirely.

It takes a semi-truck and a pretty sturdy trailer to get it to your house.

And, they don’t come cheap. So, you can expect the driver of that truck (who probably has a family of his own to support BTW), to want some kind of compensation for hauling your box to your curb.

These delivery charges are fairly straightforward fees, based on equipment and mileage costs (plus a tidy profit for the driver, I assure you). There’s a little bit of negotiating room, but not much. You’re better off trying to bargain the price of the container down a bit, to help pay those delivery fees.

If you’re buying the container at the lowest possible cost already, well…

Here’s a few things to consider;

There are different types of trailers available to haul shipping containers.There are flat-bed trailers, Container Chassis trailers, and even “tilt-bed” trailers (like the one in the photo above this paragraph).

Using a “tilt-bed” trailer means that the container can be “dumped, right on the ground. In fact, if you’re really careful, you can unload it right on  to your prepared foundation.

Alas, most of these “tilt-beds” are only used to deliver containers within a 100 mile radius of the storage yard they were harbored in.

The tilt bed driver will need at least 80 feet of hard ground and he/she must be able to back in and slide the container off the truck. If the driver can not drop the container due to lack of access to your site… guess what?

You still owe them for the transportation and even the return costs.

If you’re beyond that magic 100 mile circle, well… you’ll be required to lift the container off of a container chassis trailer.

Note the “twistlocks” in the corners and along the sides to attach the container to the trailer.

Or, you can go the “flatbed trailer ” route:

Either way, this means you’re gonna need a crane on site… or a pair of Lulls and a few REALLY heavy Duty Straps.

(That’s the route I choose, unless I’m stacking them up over two containers high.)

More on that, later…

And “Delivery cost is nonrefundable” is STANDARD.

Of course, if you have something against “TRUCKERS” you could always ship it to yourself, UPS.

Remember that it’s an over-sized package, and it requires special handling. You should be able to afford it. Let’s see… carry the three, divide by the square root of Ronin’s IQ, multiply by OMG… that comes to $214,341.86.

Glad I could clear this up for you.

Ronin

See you next time!

The “Santa” Sequel

Man, Christmas was a tough day!

Joshua got up, expecting toys, and sugarplums,  and candy canes, and all he got was an old dented can of peaches (in heavy syrup!) with a big red bow on top.

I had to tell Joshua that Santa had finally given up on bringing presents to little boys and girls, and was probably checking himself into rehab, courtesy of that Dr.Drew character we keep seeing on TV.

Oy! That kid howled and howled until the sugar rush from that peach syrup finally wore off! I thought he’d never go to sleep!

And, it took FOREVER for that EXTRA STRENGTH TYLENOL to finally kick in.

Ever been pummeled in the head with a one pound can of peaches by a hysterical child? I didn’t think so!

So, while I got up today and prepared my icepack (for my concussion) and my black coffee, eager to shake visions of my howling two year old terrorist out of my head, I finished watching the security tape of Santa leaving a message stuck to my TV.

You know, for a spry old guy who can fly around the planet in one night, and squeeze down any chimney ever built… he was moving awful slow and he had a bandage on his face.

Now, I figured that he was just stumbling  around in my living room because he was bringing bad news…

But I received  this in my email  (anonymously no less), this morning…

Somebody’s gonna get coal in their stocking for YEARS!

And finally, I can actually say that I didn’t have anything to do with  it!

So, since I’m “Scott free” on this one…

(No relation to those “Clark, Roger or Scott” characters at www.wakefielddoctrine.com)

Stay tuned!

Because right after I hide this other can of peaches so that my kid doesn’t try to kill me with it… again…

Next time, we’re gonna start a three episode series on finding that “perfect place to call home”.

After all, those shipping containers you’re converting into an affordable home have to go SOMEWHERE, right?

See ya tomorrow!

A message from Santa about “Statistics”

After a Christmas Eve filled with rain, cold, and virgin eggnog…

I retired, to try and get a few hours sleep…

Okay, so I didn’t sleep with visions of “sugarplum colored containers” dancing in my head…

But…I got up this morning, and raced to the Christmas tree…

Only to remember that we didn’t have one. Oy.

But, there it was… stuck to the TV Set;

A note… addressed to me, held in place with a gooey peppermint candy cane (that looked suspiciously like it had been hurled up by a sick reindeer who’d been eating chili);

Dear Ronin;

This is Santa… that jolly fat guy with the beard that isn’t your “weird Uncle Ernie”. You know the one I mean… the uncle that lives at the penitentiary.

I just wanted you to know that Christmas is gonna be a little bit light, this year. You see, people are getting stranger by the minute!

I started off the year like I always do, “googling” each household, to find out “who’s been naughty and who’s been nice…” and quite frankly, it’s no wonder the dinosaurs disappeared. I suspect that one of them was a psychic, and figured out how people were gonna turn out, once they crawled out of the primordial ooze…

But, I know how you are about “statistics” so here’s the meat of the data;

I Googled “naughty or nice.”

The first result showed:

428,534,120 Good
428,523,119 Bad

I couldn’t believe my eyes, so I ran the numbers again. The second result showed:

428,534,118 Good
428,523,121 Bad

I know that, even for you, the indicators are clear;

I really can’t, in good faith, fuel up the reindeer (man, they love that mistletoe chili!) and head out into what’s left of the ozone, to  deliver presents, all the while knowing that it’s just a “crap shoot”, and I could make a big mistake.

C’mon, try and understand, some of you are just plain nuts!

I can barely afford the liability insurance! I’m not kidding!

Hey, I’m up to my “Ho-ho-ho” in litigation right now, what with the elves trying to “organize”.

It’s gotten so bad that I’ve had to spend the “toy money” to hire bodyguards!

To make matters worse, those PETA crackpots are giving me grief about “reindeer abuse”, and then there’s that ACLU nonsense about my trying to “restrict the rights of children to free expression and free thought” because of my theme song;

You better watch out.
You better not cry.
You better not pout.
I’m telling you why.
Santa Claus is coming to town.

He sees you when you are sleeping
He knows when you’re awake,
He knows when you’ve been bad or good
So be good for goodness’ sake.

Like  I could actually control kids! If I could, I’d bottle it and then retire to Tahiti on the profits!

Anyway, it looks like Christmas is going to have to take one for the team, this year.

Sure… Maybe Joshua finally started behaving.

I mean, there hasn’t been a suspicious fire in Biloxi for a week now. I mean, it COULD happen… maybe… when pigs finally fly in formation over the White House dropping… um… er… “encouragement”  from the sky, onto the heads of those elected officials that are there to spread “tidings of good will throughout the land” in the first place….

So, in direct violation of the “new” work statutes those “nasty little unionized midgets” drafted and posted for all to see…

… I have enlisted the help of the some of the elves who remained loyal to me (and even the Mrs. who is just back from getting a much needed “lift and separate” surgery…  on her er… um… well, she’s back from the “spa”… with a rack bigger than Blitzen’s!)  to assist me in making sense of the numbers.

It’s turned out to be a daunting task, and much larger than we first envisioned. Unfortunately we missed the deadline this year, so I’m having to let this holiday season slide, like Joan River’s last facelift… We hope to have this finished up by 5pm on the 24th of December 2010, but there is a good possibility that it might take even longer.

You see, like an idiot, I bought some “bargain basement” HP computers with new Intel Processors (man, I’m gonna get those Ebay guys!)  and now… I’m stuck in a tech-support loop with a guy in Mumbai.

And the scanners I bought on sale on Ebay aren’t helping matters any. First, the shipping cost more than the danged computers! Don’t even get me started…  Next year those Ebay brats are gonna get a stocking full of rocks, let me tell you!

And the economy has drive the price of toys up into orbit! My operating budget graphs look like a rollercoaster diagram at Disneyland! (Hey, you try balancing a budget when every kid in the world wants a “Transformer” or an “Action Barbie with genuine gold plated high heels“…)

Anyway, it appears that the scanning software is having trouble reading the checkmarks the elves made (I guess I should make them cut back on the “spiced eggnog” during working hours… and now the blasted thing can’t read the datasheets.

Good, bad, um… whatever???

So now that you’ve awakened this Christmas morning and there are no presents under your tree (by the way, WHERE did you hide your tree?) at least you can tell Joshua this story.

Did you really think I was gonna tell him myself? Heavens no! I’ll have you do it. People already hate you, so you should be used to it!

And hey, Joshua is  young and he’ll probably forget this eventually, with the help of a good therapist.

Thank you for your patience and understanding in these trying times… or, like it or lump it, Buddy!

Sincerely,

Santa

PS. One peep out of you and I swear you’ll be moved from the “whatever” list to the “naughty list” for the rest of your life! You aren’t the only one with a middle finger, Bub!

Christmas In the Container Homeland…

Okay, so it’s Christmas-time in our “Container Homeland…”

In light of the fact that the weather is horrid and I’m afraid to go outside with all the nuts running around trying to buy last minute presents…

And it grows closer to that time when Santa will load his sleigh, and fly from the North Pole to places “hither and yon…”

I look at the melees at Walmart and I’m reminded that people have forgotten that the really cool thing about Christmas (aside from the religious significance), is the attitude of the people trying to fool Santa into thinking that they’d  been good ALL year long…

So, I thought I’d take a moment to post  some of “Ronin’s Observations About the Holidays” to remind some of us what is really going on…

Stuff like this;

When caught up in the Christmas Madness and surrounded by crazed shoppers…

“Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.”

Remember Campers, H1N1 is everywhere.

I decided to buy a friend a book for Christmas. So, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman behind the desk;

“Excuse me… Where’s the self-help section?”

She actually said:

“If I told you it would defeat the purpose.”

My neighbor says that the main reason Santa is so darned jolly is because he knows “where all the bad girls live”.

Hmmmm…

At that book store, I overheard another customer ask that same saleslady;

“Excuse me, Ma’am… I’m going to buy a Christmas present for my new girlfriend. What do you think she’d like?”

She replied;

“Does she like you?”

He answered:

“Well, yeah, I think so…”

And she said;

“Well, if she really likes you, apparently she’ll like anything.”

And I hope that I don’t make the same mistake I made last year;

In our house, we celebrate both Hanukkah and Christmas, so that Joshua doesn’t feel like he’s missing out on something fun.

Josh got a toy, and I bought my wife some expensive perfume… and I gave my brother-in-law a pistol I’d had for years.

And when I was wrapping them, I put a ‘flowery’ note in her present saying:

“Honey, I hope that you love this and that you’ll try it out on yourself sometime really soon…”

When she opened it up and read the note, she got a really weird look on her face, and then just gave me one of her;

“There’s a reason people are afraid of Indians, Paleface… ” look…

I had accidentally given her the pistol.

And last… I had to take a bus to another town to go shopping recently. How do Santa’s reindeer know to cross at that yellow “Deer Crossing” road sign?

More later. I have to fight off an old lady and her seven kids… to make sure that Joshua get’s this “Talking Elmo” Doll he’s been seeing on TV… Thank goodness I know Jew-Fu!  Oy!

And now… Enjoy the Movie… without further interruption;

Container Home Cut-Outs…

Greetings, Campers!

I know, I know…

It’s “the holidays” and we’re supposed to be “nice” and play with the kids, and negotiate truces with the neighbors, and wait patiently for Santa to get here…

Hey, he brought it on himself. He’s ruining the economy!

… so we can knock him on the head with a pipe, and take all the toys for ourselves…

Um… Oh, crap. I said that out loud, didn’t I? Oops.. My bad.

Well, I thought that before this year is over, I’d get one last big “Container Home” rant out of the way.

So, I’m putting the “Ho-Ho-Ho”… on “Ho-Ho-Hold”… for a minute or two.

And… If you don’t like it, you can just start clicking that left mouse button now…

Anyone who has been here before knows that my family is building a home out of Corten Steel Shipping Containers, to replace a home that was destroyed by Hurricane Katrina.

And, it’s certainly not without it’s trials and tribulations.

Our circumstances are anything but ideal and we’re trying to put out several fires that are all burning simultaneously.  Suffice to say, we’re planning, scheming, and eventually even building… with our hands full.

And if we can build our Container Home, with the veritable whirlwind of crap that is encircling us…  then so can you.

I told you a while back that I was going to start answering question from my email, right here on the blog.

Why? Well, it’s fun… for starters! Some of the situations are almost comical.

Like this one, that plays right into my “Kick some of those rats at Planning and Zoning right in the butt as often as possible” sinister plans… Muwahahahahah! :

Hey Ronin,

I’ve just submitted some Container Home plans at my town’s planning and zoning department, with my application for a building permit.

And they are telling me that they need an engineering report that details how the alterations made to the skin of our 40′ high cubes reduce their strength.

We’re building a one story,  1,540 square foot home, using (5) containers.

The container sit “side by side”, (5) across to form a 40′ x 40′ box. There are several bearing walls inside, to help hold up the roof.

We’re altering the containers by cutting out holes for doors and windows.

I talked to the guys I bought the shipping containers from (they’re well-established and move a lot of containers) and they are working up the job report (cost analysis) of making the alterations, but even they have never been asked for any engineering  analysis “for the openings” before.

They were actually surprised, because after calling around, nobody else that they deal with has ever been asked for anything like this before, either!

I told the planning and zoning guys that the strength from an ISBU comes from the framework, but they are still demanding “hard numbers.” We are currently working with a local engineer, but he has no experience with shipping containers at all, and it would be helpful to connect him up with someone who does.

What do we do?

Signed,

Hating Math and minor bureaucrats…

Dear Math-hater,

Here’s my “Q&A – Wisdom for the week.” Get it while it’s hot, because my brain cells rarely touch, and this may not repeat itself again for a while! This “holiday season… is anything but…” Oy. 

Note to readers: THIS is what he’s talking about. He’s made holes in his Containers, to place doors. It probably looks something like this… It’s what mine look like after I cut them up. I love plasma cutters!

While I’m quite used to hearing all about these Planning and Zoning Nazi gyrations (you just have to read my blog about my ISBU Home Building exploits to see some of the gymnastics you are forced to go through):

This particular request for an engineering report (from whoever asked you for it) borders on the ridiculous.

There’s a reason that your Container Fabrication shop hasn’t been asked for these “numbers’ before…

There AREN’T any really pertinent numbers here, when you’re talking about a single story residential structure…

The steel skin on a shipping container is just a couple of  millimeters of corrugated steel skin. It’s jobs is to contain the boxes full of cargo held within the box it forms…  not to maintain pressures from outside the box.

That’s why that skin is “inset” inside the frame. Even IF it could make a difference, it could only have an effect during “heavy weather or loading” racking or shearing force deflections. The frame bears the brunt of the loading.

And even then, the skin’s contribution is very minimal.

You’re not building a wood house out of sticks. “Not by the hair of your chinny-chin-chin…”

I suspect that is the origin of your “engineering report” request. The guys that you are talking to are used to dealing with wood homes.

If you understand the design of the modern shipping container in it’s raw form, the POINT is for the frame to carry the load, and allow it to be used in a “track and stack” deployment, while loaded with thousands of pounds of cargo, per container.

(“Track and stack” just means that someone supposedly charts where each container actually gets placed.)

The reason this container is so vital to shipping is in part due to it’s ability to be connected to another series of containers, FRAME TO FRAME, forming a giant “honeycomb” like structure. This “structure” is capable of absorbing and deflecting tons and tons of pressure, safely.

FYI: Just don’t get carried away; Remember, Corten Campers…  “over 9 high and you’re gonna die…”

I’ve heard people address this kind of “stress reduction nonsense” when talking about applying siding or even insulation to the outside of the boxes. Here’s the other side of that “skin stress” coin;

(Might as well kill two birds with one post, huh?)

I once had a contractor tell me that if I put hardiplank on my boxes, it would double their strength.

He got really irritated when I laughed right in his face.

Needless to say, he was just trying to sell me his stockpile of siding. It’s nonsense. Siding is attached to containers thru the use of wood firring strips, If your container racks that  much, those nails or screws will pop out like firecrackers.

Using closed cell foam OVER the skin to form a unitized insulation membrane has more effect than the skin by itself… or for that matter, any application of siding put over it when talking about deflecting or absorbing “load forces.”

Now, not just “any old insulation” will accomplish this. Using Rigid insulation won’t do this, and neither will fiberglass batts. It’s the big “glued in” effect of that closed cell foam that does the trick. The foam sticks to everything, in effect making it one big solid sandwich.

Think about NASCAR on the ‘tube.

Using closed cell foam on your container home is like wrapping your container in duct tape. But even then… the dominant benefits aren’t the “implied” massive structural advantages. It’s all about what that glorious insulating foam does for your home in the “comfort and control of mold, water, and vapor” aspects, beyond keeping you warm in winter and cool in summer.

Anyone who tells you otherwise is full of crap.

Your container house is getting it’s strength from the STEEL FRAMING hidden inside it.

Like I said, the REAL benefit to using that closed cell foam is primarily in the vapor and moisture barriers that are created as a by-product of insulating the box to habitable levels, using a quality CLOSED-CELL foam product.

The “big solid load-assisting sandwich” is just a MINOR byproduct, because the frame does most of the work all by itself.

Okay, back to the problem at hand;

Typically, when containers are modified with openings for doors and windows, those openings are “caged” right back in, by making boxes (“welded in – internal framing”) constructed of plate steel (generally 1/4th inch) for those doors and windows to attach to. These new “steel boxes” in the skin would form your “rough opening.”

It’s my position that this would actually serve to reinforce the “skin,” and certainly not weaken it. Look at the photograph up there again… You’ll see exactly what I’m talking about.

Like it carried any load to begin with… (Picture Ronin rolling eyes…)

I suppose you could claim that leaving a small section of Corten skin in place at each end would combat racking. But, I doubt very seriously if a structural engineer could document any difference worth measuring.

Perhaps I’ll ask Col. Runkle for HIS opinion. If ANYONE knows, it’s HIM.

Maybe not… He’ll probably make me do push-ups till I puke.  Man, lately the Colonel has become the guy I love to hate… that “know-it-all…”

I’m betting that the same thing could be accomplished by leaving a “gusset” of Corten steel in each corner.

But, would I do it? No. It’s just absurd. That container isn’t going anywhere near “failureville” because I punched a sliding glass door-set, or some windows into it.

I’ve been building ISBU based Shipping Container Homes since 1977 and I’ve done it on more continents than most people have visited in their lifetimes… (and in some of the most adverse conditions that you can possibly imagine).

I’ve never had ONE fail because I removed a piece of steel skin. NEVER.

Can you challenge their “engineering report/analysis” demand? Can they prove to you that your structure is “unsound” because you cut holes in the skin?

I have never heard of a P&Z Nazi demanding an engineering report for each opening cut into Corten Steel skin on a container, and I’m betting that nobody else has, either.

And it’s not like I’ve only built one or two of these “Corten Castles.” I’ve been building an average of about 3-4 a year, since 1977 (if you average them all out, as  I did take “a few years off” to pursue “some other things”). Anyway…. you do the math.

In fact, the reason I’m doing it again now, for MY family (and several other families), is that it’s the ONLY way  that I believe we’re going to get our families back into  safe, affordable homes before “the world comes to an end in 2012″…

This “request for information” really sounds more like “just driving up the price of your project to make it go away” than anything else to me… They know that making you hire an engineer to give them the numbers is going to be an expensive proposition.

I wonder how these same guys explain “steel skyscrapers” that are basically nothing but girders and glass?  On a much smaller scale, you’re essentially doing the same thing.

So… Is it possible to calculate the engineering numbers yourself? Well, yeah. I guess so.

Your local Library (or local university Library, for sure) will have a copy of “Mark’s Standard Handbook for Mechanical Engineers.”

(Here’s what it will probably look like. It’s one of the copies that  I have. Yeah, I admit it. I have a few. I hate to throw books away.)

If you do any welding or metal fabrication, this book should be on your shelf.

I know… I know… it’s not cheap. But, trust me, it’ll pay for itself.

Depending on what version you can get your hands on… Turn to pages 5-16 (which talks about the “mechanics” of materials), and read thru pages 5-76 where the formulas for calculating stresses of materials are fully explained.

Keep reading… say about 6-12 thru 6-46, and you’ll discover the properties of iron and steel.

If this gets too “heady” (and it certainly can) it’s possible that you could hire a local engineer (in a small shop) to do the math, for $60-75 bucks an hour. (I asked around to establish “average” rates) The fact that you have a shipping container at the heart of your project has nothing to do with these calculations. Just think of it as “corrugated steel welded to Steel Pipe framing.”

Or, you could just bite the bullet (get yourself into top physical shape first!) and go ask the Colonel for help. Now, I bet he gives you some “Christmas P.T.” to do before he’ll talk to you… but at least you’ll get the best possible information, from “one of the sharpest tools in the shed” when it comes to anything that has to do with “structural” in Container Home Building. The Colonel is worth every penny he’ll charge you. And more importantly, he can sign and stamp the report.

And if those yahoos at P&Z don’t like it, I’m sure the Colonel will have THEM running around the grinders until they die of old age… early.

I’m betting that it wouldn’t take more than about a day or so to actually come up with the numbers to throw at these fools. But, it’s going to cost you about $500-800 bucks, for nothing. It’s just a waste of time, as even with these numbers, I doubt that they’d know what to do with them.

Gimme a break…

And give them my URL. I’ll be happy to tear them a new… um… er… never mind.

Stay tuned.

Happy Holidays,  You Guys (and Gals)!!

Stalking Santa… for fun and profit!

Greetings!

No Container Home Post today! No wild rantings about insulation, or ISBU’s, or even interest rates!

I wanted to, but my wife said my blood pressure was already too high!

So… Instead, let’s just all spend some time with our families and just enjoy the season, huh?

Here’s some “Christmas Cheer” to make you laugh…

Now  I warn you in advance that some of these are a little bit “cheeky”.

Watch ‘em at your own risk.

Oy – Oy – Oy!

From my family to yours…

Merry Christmas…

You Gentiles, you!

Know that we think of each and every one of you!

Christmas in Container Home-land…

You know…

You can’t play with plasma cutters all day, every day. As much as I’d like to, sometimes I have to step back from the shipping container (soon to be a Container Home), put all the tools away, and just sit down to rest.

After all, I’m not getting any younger, especially not with a two year old terrorist living in my house, trying to kill me at every turn.

So, we’re gonna take a break from the “Cult of the Corten Container Church” today… and talk about “the holidaze…”

For some reason, here at Container Home Central… people send us Christmas cards.

Now, I’m sure that they know we’re Jewish, because we have everything but a Menorah stenciled (in spray on snow) on our front window.

And aside from the suspicion that they’re still trying to recruit us into their own “special brand of religion” (just kidding…)

I’m starting to realize something about this “tradition;”

It appears that you Gentiles really need to spend a considerable amount of time and planning to insure that you’ve delivered “the maximum effect” for that Yuletide Greeting!

Stuff like timing, size and quality are evidently really, really important!

Well, here’s something… Even us Jews get caught up in this contest! But, you can’t do like I do, and rush to get everything taken care of, before the Thanksgiving Turkey has even hit room temperature! Noooooooo!

Why not?

Well, apparently… sending Christmas cards too early is not only ineffective…  it can be really humiliating!

It’s like giving the competition “early warning.” It reveals your “social position”, it reveals your resources (the size and quality of card), and it gives the enemy a chance to levy a devastating “counter-attack”.

And, if you’re late sending out that little piece of Christmas Cheer… a late Christmas card runs the risk of shaming the recipient into sending you a crappy one back, thus reducing your own incoming “quality card  Christmas Haul.”

So, it’s better to be early, but not TOO early.   Remember, you’re not trying be the starting gun… you’re trying to just set the pace, and compel your neighbors to think about that “perfect” card,  just for you and yours.

Why would you do this?

Well, if they’re in the card section at the store, you’re gonna have more time to yourself in the toy section, right? Hmmm?

Let’s face it, a kid without that “most desired of toys at Christmastime” can be a real downer…

Plus, it means that you’ll get a really good card in return… and in the end, it’s still all about you, right? I mean, you actually WANT people to see those incoming cards, and use them to determine your social status!

Especially the ones that fold out to form “pop-up” diorama’s and stuff!

Am I right? Huh? Admit it. It’s okay, We’re all adults here… mostly.

And in spite of what they “say”… like everything else, SIZE MATTERS!

Important people (or at least people who are actually foolish enough to think they are important) send big, gawdy, intricate, life-sized or even sparkly, glittery, shiny… looking Christmas cards.

Why do they do this?

It’s easy. They do it to assert their “largess” and make you feel small in comparison. It’s okay to acknowledge it.

They just know the rules of the game, that’s all…

They want you to know that they’re the “big dawgs”…

Having their card on your mantel makes them the “big dawgs” in YOUR house too! It’s an invasion, I tell you!

Now, if you want entry into this “club”, it’s gonna cost you, but supposedly it’s usually worth it.

And don’t forget that there is a time and place for everything, including those “cheap and dirty”  Christmas cards.

You know the ones I’m talking about… the ones that are “4 for a buck” at the dollar store. You can tell these from the rest because the ink smears when you touch them, the envelopes are the wrong color,  and they smell like Santa’s butt (after he’s sat in that sleigh for 250,000 miles in a row)…

These are the “real cards.”  This is the “meat and potatoes” of Christmas Cheer. They’re the ones that insure your “prey” that you’re “in the game” completely!   Just using them insures that you send this message to the recipient:

“This card totally embodies my feeling about your family during this festive Yule… and yes, it eagerly implies bad taste, poverty or blatant disrespect to you and your seventeen idiot children who leave their toys in my driveway.” 

PS. I want off your Christmas card list.

I love these cards! These are particularly effective for ending pointless long term Christmas card exchanges with those people you met in 1984 at a rest stop outside the Ozarks, whom you can’t even put a face to, any longer.

And, here’s a “Christmas card rule to live by”;

Avoid the urge to do a “drive-by” Christmas Card.

You know… That “first-time” Christmas card sent on impulse to that guy or girl you just met on the Internet, or at work. These cards can have devastating consequences.

Some of those cards will send an “unintended invitation” to show up on your front porch, completely unannounced, with six other losers that you don’t even know…  to drink all your “Christmas Cheer” and eat all your fancy shortbread Santa Claus cookies.

You know, the ones that come in those  cool little tins! Nothing is more fun than sitting on the couch biting the head off Santa, while the kid tears through the house with his toy trucks! Vroom vrooooooom!

Merry Christmas!

FYI: Ma is keepin ‘em busy, while I weld the doors shut on their Lexus… Let ‘em stand in the rain until the tow-truck gets here… That’ll teach ‘em… the “door-crashin’ knuckleheads!”

And… Yes, it’s “satire.” I’m just kidding.

I’m not really a cruel, heartless, mean-spirited Grinch of a  miscreant…

Wait, yes I am!  It says so right here – in this card I got from my mother-in-law.

Never mind…

Note: I can’t take “complete” credit for this post – it’s my own “parody” of a post I read a while back… I only wish I could remember where it was, so I could credit THAT author, too!

“If it be YOU”… contact me, okay?

Strong Foam makes Strong Container Homes…

Greetings Campers!

It’s time for another exciting episode of;

“Man, that Ronin guy is a Container Home Building Idiot!”

Lately, I’ve been asked a certain question several times, even though I’ve talked about the answer endlessly.

No! It’s not the question of my sanity and the rapidly shredding thread that seems to hold everything all together.

I’ll have you know that electro-shock therapy, the lobotomy, heavy dosages of meds, and 72 hours periods of confinement have seems to slow the symptoms down remarkably well…

It’s the question about Spray Foam Insulation, and why it’s better for your container home.

And I was asking myself why people were asking the same question over and over again, every 3-4 months or so…

The SPRAY FOAM question…

… not the “Is Ronin Insane?” one… stop it!

I can see you spitting at the monitor! Oy, you’re gonna get electrocuted if you keep that up!

The answer?

Well, it occurs to me that there are a lot of new people looking at this Container Home Building blog lately. As the economy gets worse and worse, and housing gets harder and harder, more and more people are searching for answers, solutions, and alternatives…

So, if you’ve been here for a while, please indulge me as I attempt to write the “Complete Spray Foam  Insulation”  – “Don’t ever ask me again”… basics – primer. 

I’ve talked a lot about how spray foam insulation (the closed cell variety, please) is the best way to insulate a container home ( or most homes for that matter).

Closed cell foam is easily applied to the outer surface of your Containers, allowing the elimination of cold spots.  In most markets, a confident and handy person can apply it themselves, using a rented sprayer. YMMV (your mileage may vary).

You can even buy kits now (using the same exact foam), to let virtually anyone insulate their house, at a price that is way below what a professional applicator would charge.

I’ve even seen cooperating ISBU Container Home building families all pitch in together to buy a really good system, and then just pass it from family to family, until everybody got the job done. And then… CRAIGSLIST!

Why would anyone do this? I mean, it sounds like a lot of hard work…

You’re going to get about r7 for every inch of closed cell foam that you apply to your Container Home. So, a few inches  (3 of ‘em) gets you an r21 on the walls, and a couple of inches more than that ( for a total of 5) will get you an r35 in the floor if you want  (or need) it.

Now remember, spray foam is just a part of your arsenal against the “hot and cold running beasties…”

We all know by now that Ronin highly recommends using SIPs (structural insulated panels) to form your roof.  Using SIPs you can easily build an r50 roof.

Cold outside? I spit at the cold! In my spray foam and SIPs cocoon I’m all snuggley warm! Hey, my house is so tight that I can heat it with this Ronco Lighter!

But, this post is about “Spray Foam.”

Putting insulation on the outside of a container just makes sense.

There isn’t any good reason for making the inside of a small box even smaller. The POINT of Container Home Building is to take a readily available component (in this case an ISBU Shipping Container made of Corten Steel) and squeeze every square inch out of it that you can, to make a wonderful, sustainable, energy efficient home.

Spray Foam Insulation (SPF) is just another component in that puzzle. Because it fills every single nook and cranny, you don’t waste energy by letting heat out in the winter or cool air out  in the summer.

Plus… Closed cell foam is exactly that. Closed cell. This means that once applied, it forms a vapor barrier. That’s even more insurance against nasty energy leaks. And because it’s closed cell, there aren’t any moisture leaks either, because it forms a moisture barrier. Talk about getting your money’s worth!

And it also forms a really efficient sound absorber to quiet your house down. It just keeps getting better and better.

But wait, there’s more!

And there really IS more! Using SPF actually reinforces and strengthens your home. It’s like wrapping your house in duct tape!

If you’ve got a NASCAR watching bone in your body, you know how important duct tape is! Right? I mean, it’s good for everything!

I even use it around the house!

But… seriously… SPF Polyurethane Foam will help to strengthen your Container Home.

Just like in any other home, the walls in your Container home are a part of the structural component system of the building. In residential construction, the weight of the actual roof, the weight of the shingles, any standing moisture (like rain water and snow) add “weight” to your house.

This exerts “compression.”

Compression is the downward forces on the walls that comes from this weight being piled on top of them.

Now, it doesn’t stop there, either.

Strong winds, tropical storms, tornadoes and hurricanes can  impose “lateral forces” onto your home’s walls.

This lateral force is called “shearing force.”

Ask any Planning and Zoning Nazi, and they’ll tell you that building codes require that your home’s walls must be designed to withstand all these various forces and excessive loads.

However, when walls are built to just the minimum standards (like in most wood houses, for instance), while they still might be safe, evidence of this kind of “movement”  (like creaking and shaking during high winds) occurs.

Putting higher density, closed cell spray foam insulation inside your walls fully adheres to both the exterior sheathing and the walls themselves, in effect reinforcing both of them in a great big “foamy sandwich.”

While I’m often accused of being “too rigid,” this kind of rigidity is good. With this added strength, wall movement due to wind, vibration, and even MP3 blaring occupants is reduced to a minimum.

And, yes, there’s more benefit from this collaboration. Now not only do you have tight, well-insulated walls, your walls have “greater than code” required resistance to those forces we talked about that create “racking events…” such as hurricanes or other heavy weather events.

SPF also can add A MASSIVE AMOUNT of structural strength to other types of buildings. A study by the National Association of Home Builders (NAHB) Research Division demonstrated that SPF filled walls could add from 75% to 200% racking strength to walls of OSB, plywood, light gauge metal, vinyl siding or gypsum board.

So…

Listen to  “Crazy Old Ronin…” and use Spray Foam on your Container Home project. Not only will you be warm… you’ll be safer.

And, that’s money worth spending.

Stay tuned.

1. Test results are reported in “Testing and Adoption of Spray Polyurethane Foam for Wood Frame Building Construction” (May 25, 1992) prepared by NAHB Research Center for The Society of the Plastics Industry/Polyurethane Foam Contractors Division. 2. Test results are reported in a letter from Bob Dewey, Mechanical Engineer, NAHB Research Center to Mason Knowles, The Society of the Plastics Industry/Spray Polyurethane Foam Division (November 18, 1996).